Dating a korean man in korea
on the other hand is acting coy, not being outright honest. I found myself — hard as I tried, it just wasn’t in me). I even gave him hand-made chocolate on Valentine’s Day.
For example, if a guy asked me how many bottles of soju I could drink, I would say “half a bottle” instead of “two bottles.” That would be me “doing in the proper way. (I had already been working for several years by then.) We dated over a year. I was in love, of course, but what was happening to me?
I thought it more a fantasy of men who craved unequal power relations with their girlfriends than a reality.
It’s an old battle: fighting against the chasm, between the expectations of South Korean men (and even women who embrace these expectations) and the real, live selves of South Korean women.
As a young woman, I kept wondering about how I should act, and how much of myself I should show men.
It’s strange: In struggling, I sometimes found myself trying to do is more explicit; it’s acting in a cute, flirty way, usually with funny faces, shrugging one’s shoulders and shaking one’s head in a child-like way, or often answering questions in a higher-pitched voice.
I had never been the problem; I was fine the way I was in my entirety, whether independent, outgoing or girlish, and I could express myself fully if I was given space, without judgment.
I just needed to have the right opportunity, and the right man, to let these ‘girlish’ traits show.
I’m not exactly quiet, and I’m definitely not the ‘submissive girl’ that many people see South Korean girls as. But somehow, my personality became a problem when I started dating men in South Korea at the age of 20. I thought, is my outgoing personality — which was attractive to them in the beginning — an obstacle to developing a stable relationship? A bunch of my girlfriends had similar worries when dating South Korean men. Meeting the expectations of your significant other may not always be easy.But add on top of that cultural differences and you got a whole new pandora’s box.Note: Before you bust out your calendar to start counting each day, just use the 100 day calculator on Naver!I see myself as a lively, bright and sociable girl.